Charlie's Blog: December 2018


Father Jerk

And Nadab and Abiu, the sons of Aaron, taking their censers, put fire therein, and incense on it, offering before the Lord strange fire: which was not commanded them. And fire coming out from the Lord destroyed them, and they died before the Lord. And Moses said to Aaron: This is what the Lord hath spoken: I will be sanctified in them that approach to me, and I will be glorified in the sight of all the people. And when Aaron heard this, he held his peace. And Moses called Misael and Elisaphan, the sons of Oziel, the uncle of Aaron, and said to them: Go and take away your brethren from before the sanctuary, and carry them without the camp. And they went forthwith and took them as they lay, vested with linen tunicks, and cast them forth, as had been commanded them.

I have a little saying I tell myself. People don't listen to you until you stop talking to them. This saying comes from the numerous times when I have tried to talk to people about things. It may be something benign like a change in diet to something more serious like mortal sin. Part of me wants to say nothing and save myself the hassle. But this is not charitable. The other part of me wants to keep hammering on the people until the message penetrates their thick skulls. But this is not charitable either. So, I take a middle path where I tell someone what they need to hear. If they refuse to listen, I shake the dust from my clothes and move on. This is the prescription the Lord gave to His apostles, and you see it demonstrated in St. Paul who evangelized the Jews in an area first and moved on to the Gentiles. To this day, the Jews have the Law and the Prophets, but they reject the one who rose from the dead as foretold in Luke 16:31.

Some Jews do get the message and respond to that light. One of my favorites is St. Teresa Benedicta known more famously as Edith Stein who converted to Roman Catholicism, became a nun, and died in the Holocaust because even a Catholic Jew was still a Jew to the Nazis. But it's OK. She is a saint, and I ask for her prayers daily. But for the vast majority of Jews, Jesus is to be ignored. Christians are forbidden to mistreat Jews because of this. Charity is always the rule.

I find myself in that place where I must shake the dust from my clothes. The irony is that it concerns a priest. To be more exact, it is the priest in my parish. I have repeatedly tried to make headway with this guy in trying to get him to correct his ways. I am not alone in this. Parishioners in writing and in person have called him out repeatedly. In addition, letters have gone to the bishop about him. All of this is to no avail. Considering the fact that the Church is reluctant to even remove sexual abusers from priestly ministry, I know that nothing will happen to this priest who is merely bad at his job.

To protect his identity, I will refer to this priest by the name we use for him--Father Jerk. Trust me, he has earned this nickname. When Father Jerk was called out for being a jerk, his defense was to the point. We should be grateful that we don't have one of those child molesting priests. I am not making this up. Believe me, I am glad that we don't have one of those monster priests. But Father Jerk is cursed with the same arrogance as those pedophiles. He knows he is a bad priest, and he simply doesn't care.

Why would a man like this enter priestly ministry? Some men are called to the priesthood, and they answer the call. Others are called to the priesthood, and they do not answer the call. Then, there are those who answer the call they did not receive. This would be Father Jerk.

It is easy to figure out why Father Jerk became a priest. When he came to our parish, we knew something was up when he parked his presider's chair directly in front of the altar. I have been in many parishes, and I have never seen this done before. Apparently, it is canonically permissible as even the bishop has sat in that chair where it is parked in front of the altar. The reason no other priest does it anywhere else is because they are humble. Father Jerk is not humble. His reason for parking the chair in front of the altar is because he wants to be worshiped. He wants to be seen and adored. And this is the reason why he became a priest. His previous profession was in the hotel industry where he was not seen and adored.

Father Jerk claims that he was motivated to enter the priesthood after spending time with a cousin who was a devout Catholic. Today, that cousin shuns Father Jerk and has nothing to do with him. I know this because Father Jerk openly whines about it in his homilies which are 25% faith and doctrine and 75% autobiography. I know the reason for the estrangement. That cousin knows that Father Jerk was not called to the priesthood. For virtually every other Catholic family on earth, having a son in the priesthood is considered an awesome thing. But for the Jerk family, it is an embarrassment. This is because Father Jerk is an embarrassment.

All priests have their virtues and their flaws. Some priests have boring homilies. Others are old and frail and can barely say Mass. Others are heterodox in some of their beliefs. Still others are not the best managers of a parish. Even the great Padre Pio was not a good homilist. But these flaws are usually ameliorated by gifts in other areas. Father Jerk has no gifts. The one good thing I can say about him is that he is orthodox but barely.

We don't call it Mass anymore. We call it the Father Jerk Show. A typical Mass from Father Jerk may include a whiny homily about his own life, passive aggressive stabs at parishioners, a game show quiz, and show tunes. I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP. You don't know if you are in Catholic Church or just stumbled into a very bad Las Vegas lounge act. The whole spectacle is done for the sake of his own ego, and he takes the Novus Ordo to the absolute brink of irreverence. My wife and I have taken to attending the Spanish Mass because his Spanish is so poor that he actually has to humble himself a bit to get through it. We don't understand hardly a word of Spanish which spares us from cringing during his awful homilies.

In the confessional, Father Jerk is just as bad. You will go to confess your sins, and this jerk will talk you out of it. He doesn't offer absolution and spiritual direction. He just gives you excuses for doing wrong. This is because this is what he does in his own life. The result is the Ten Commandments become the Ten Suggestions in the world of Father Jerk. When I confess to him, it ends up in an argument as I explain to him what the Catholic Church teaches concerning faith and morals.

As for the management of the parish, Father Jerk is very bad. He increased the budget as giving has declined as people exit the parish to get the hell away from him. For those who remain, he harangues endlessly about the need to increase their giving. But if the giving increases, he blows it with increased spending. The former hotel manager can't manage the parish.

As for his work ethic, Father Jerk is incredibly lazy. Daily Mass is cancelled for an entire week on a regular basis. Parishioners would complain except they don't want to go to his Masses anyway. When a visiting priest comes, it is welcome relief from the Father Jerk Show. And Father Jerk is absent from the parish often because he hates our parish and our parishioners. Everyone cringes around him and his jokey demeanor. We encountered some parishioners from his old parish who raved about their new priest but were stone silent about Father Jerk as they gave us a look of pity.

Father Jerk has no friends. No one likes him. It is hard to love someone who is already in love with himself. So, Father Jerk whines about his loneliness in his homilies. Then, there are the dogs. Father Jerk came to our parish with three very smelly dogs. The rectory now reeks of the smell which would be OK except that he lets his dogs urinate and defecate all around the church as well. I have personally had to step around dog turds on my way into church. Father Jerk also allows the dogs to come into the sanctuary and even the sacristy. Finally, one day, one of those smelly mutts finally dies. Father Jerk loses his mind over this and still cries about it over a year later. He had the dog cremated and had the ashes of the deceased animal under his presider's chair at Mass. People have lost family members during this time and have shed less tears than Father Jerk has for his beloved dog. It would not surprise me if I learned that Father Jerk baptized those dogs and fed them consecrated hosts. The man has shed more tears over his dead dog than for any of his sheep.

This is not a man of God. This is just some egomaniac in a collar. As for his sexuality, I think he is a sodomite. I can't prove this because I would have to spy on him and his private life. I am simply not going to do this. But he displays the same level of narcissism I see among homosexuals. It would not surprise me if all his time away from the parish was for the sake of immoral activities. But like I said, I can't prove this, so I will not calumniate the man. I pray that he is chaste. God help him if he isn't. And if he is a homosexual, he should have never entered the priesthood. That estranged cousin may know this secret.

It is a sin to engage in detraction. Of course, Father Jerk has told me in the confessional that detraction isn't a sin. Hell, he didn't even know what detraction was until I told him. This is a man who graduated from seminary, yet I can't tell if he has even read the catechism. But I think it is also a sin to withhold information that people have a right to know. When it comes to priests and bishops, parishioners have a right to know if their shepherds are not holy and righteous. It is because of this reluctance to call them out that wolves and monsters have entered and taken over the priesthood leading to the present sex abuse crisis in the Catholic Church.

The natural question people ask is this. Why not take this to the bishop? People already have. The bishop is not ignorant concerning Father Jerk. He has received letters from the parishioners concerning Father Jerk. When the bishop tried to move Father Jerk to another position away from us, Father Jerk told him he wasn't leaving. And there you have it. When the priest can tell his bishop what to do, that's all you need to know about the vocations crisis in the Catholic Church. In our diocese, many parishes are lucky to have a full time priest. In the case of Father Jerk, he was moved to our parish as an act of mercy for his former parish.

I am sparing Father Jerk's reputation by not putting his name on this while reserving the option to add it in an update in the future. Any of his current or former parishioners that read this will immediately recognize his true identity. Father Jerk knows he is a jerk, and he is unrepentant. He doesn't care. As for me, I am done wasting my breath and time on this clown. I pray for his repentance and conversion as I have done for the last three years. But I also pray that God takes this awful priest from us and gives us a true shepherd authentically called to the priesthood and cares for his flock. I also ask for your prayers as well. I don't need St. John Vianney. I just want a priest who isn't a jerk.



I was involved in a nasty truck accident at my day job and have been in the hospital for a couple of days. I am really banged up and sore. I need to take a break from the blog for awhile because my neck hurts too much to look at the screen of my computer for very long. Please pray for my full recovery because I need this body to do things and get work done. I will return to regular blogging when I recover. Thank you so much.--C.