Charlie's Blog: 2017


Random Thoughts on Various Subjects 57

Look out for number one and try not to step in number two.


I hate Apple, so I am absolutely gleeful to hear that they have been caught putting the screws to their customers by slowing down older iPhones. Apple has issued an apology claiming the practice of slowing down older phones was for the purpose of extending the life of the phones as the batteries became older and weaker. Everyone knows this is garbage. Here's a tweet that sums it up:

Apple has always been a scam on its customers who are the biggest sheep I know.  The whole purpose of the slowdown software was to drive sales to newer models of the iPhone. No other smartphone maker does this sort of thing. My advice to all Apple iPhone owners is to make the switch to an Android device. You are an idiot if you don't.



President Donald Trump and Secretary of Defense Mad Dog Mattis deserve credit for doing something Barack Obama could never do. They have utterly annihilated ISIS. Praise God! And how did they pull it off? They let the US military do its job.

Obama never let the DoD go in and clean house. I suspect it was because Obama had a hand in the creation of ISIS. This needs to be investigated, and those facts need to be divulged to the American public. ISIS is without a doubt an abomination to humanity. If Obama had a hand in their creation and funding, the Nobel Peace Prize winner needs to be put on trial for war crimes and crimes against humanity.


Looks like the Iranians have had enough and are starting off the new year with a little protesting. Of course, there will be a crackdown on these protests. Or, maybe, the people there have had enough of the Islamist crap like the woman in this picture who put her hijab on the end of a stick. I hope and pray these people get freedom.

I also pray for the North Koreans. As bad as Iran can be, it is heaven compared to the hellhole of North Korea. I always pray for the end of tyranny. And does it work? It worked against ISIS.

4. Q & A

Q: Would you ever buy a smartphone?

A: The closest I ever came to buying a smartphone was when Blackberry came out with the Bold. I think this phone was an absolute masterpiece.

This phone was a marvel of productivity. So many people loved it and some still swear by it even today. Then, Steve Jobs ruined the world with his iPhone. Blackberry has fallen on hard times since then, and the Bold and other phones with physical keyboards went the way of the dodo bird. But while it lasted, the Bold was a real temptation. I am sad its time has ended.

Today, I will never own a touchscreen smartphone until the flip phone ends up like the Blackberry Bold. But flip phones are hanging in there, and I am staying with them. Should I ever be forced to get one, it will probably be a very cheap one running Android. Never buy Apple.


There are no solutions. There are only trade-offs.

Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little. 

Be daring in your prayer, and the Lord will turn you from a pessimist into an optimist; from being timid, to being daring, from being feeble-spirited to being a man of faith, an apostle!

To live is to change, and to be perfect is to have changed often.

God provides the wind, but man must raise the sails.

It is idle to play the lyre for an ass.

The most deadly poison of our times is indifference. And this happens, although the praise of God should know no limits. Let us strive, therefore, to praise Him to the greatest extent of our powers.

Mary has produced, together with the Holy Ghost, the greatest thing which has been or ever will be—a God-Man; and she will consequently produce the greatest saints that there will be in the end of time.

He who suffers in patience, suffers less and saves his soul.  He who suffers impatiently, suffers more and loses his soul.

Of the things that are necessary for human life, accept only so much, as is needed to prevent death or indecency.


--Global warming sounds like a good idea. It is too bad it doesn't exist.

--The dumbest resolution you can make for the new year is to sign up for a gym membership that will go to waste by March. Choose body weight exercises instead. If you slack off, it has cost you nothing. Body weight workouts are free.

--These Christmas cleats will get you fined in the NFL. But you are still free to disrespect the flag, the country, and the NFL fans by taking a knee during the national anthem.

--The return of the XFL would be an awesome and welcome thing.

--There is still no reason given for the Las Vegas Massacre. I doubt they will ever tell us. But they know the reason.

--Disney would do well to never let Rian Johnson direct another Star Wars movie for them. But they probably will.

--I don't care to ever be on Roger Stone's Best Dressed List. I think fashion is for effeminate sodomites. Here is how a real man dresses:

Keep it blue collar. GET IT DONE!



C-Notes for WED 27 DEC 2017

1. STATUS: Cold. Al Gore is an idiot. Global warming would be welcome right now.

2. One of the last remaining smartphone refuseniks at my work gave in to the pressure. His wife bought him a smartphone for Christmas. He was trying to show it to me, but he didn't know how to turn it on. It will be dropped and broken within the week.

3. This guy makes the case that The Last Jedi is a postmodern deconstruction of Star Wars. Basically, in an age of left wing cynicism, we can't have heroes. Jedi kills your heroes. I agree with the author. The Last Jedi is what you get when you let some atheistic left wing social justice warrior types get their hands on a classic franchise. They destroy it and leave garbage in the hole they created.

4. If I were Rian Johnson, I would be trying to get into the witness relocation program right now. There must be a million nerds who would like to go Sith on his dumb ass.

5. The same deranged mentality that brought us The Last Jedi brings us this. I'm sure moms and dads will love it.

6. It was 30 degrees below zero in Minnesota. I think at those temps that the gasoline begins to gel in the tank.

7. It's not lights out yet on the NFL, but they just dimmed a great deal. It's a good thing all those kneeling players are "woke." They'll need to be awake when they are unemployed and looking for work.

8. They prayed about it. Unbelievable. And sickening.

9. This is also sickening but illuminating. If you aren't pro-life, then you are pro-death. Don't give me that rubbish about "choice."

10. I agree with Ron Paul that we are in a gigantic Federal Reserve fueled bubble which will burst. Naturally, the Republicans will take the blame for that calamity probably in time for the mid-term elections in 2018.

11. I pray everyday that Planned Parenthood gets defunded. PP exists as a giant sponge for your tax dollars and will vanish with those tax dollars. DEFUND PLANNED PARENTHOOD!

12. I give them a year.

13. I don't mean to be a cynic about marriage. I just don't see how people today can be married with their post-modern social justice warrior mindsets and beta male wimpiness as the foundation.

14. Definitely a bubble. You've been warned.

15. Kwanzaa is a BS holiday that some blacks celebrate because they hate all things Christian and/or white.

16. A year. Tops.

17. They should lock up Rosie O'Donnell for bribery. I am amazed that the woman actually has money.

18. The Latin Mass is not the future of the Roman Catholic Church. I support the Latin Mass, but you can count on it being the least attended Mass in virtually every parish. Only NFL games draw smaller crowds. I know that stings a bit, but I remember Monsignor Charles Pope lamenting these facts in a blog post. I think the future of the Roman Catholic Church lies in expunging child raping sodomite modernist heretical priests and bishops.

19. MEMENTO MORI: Princess Leia is the only one of the old crew that survived The Last Jedi. Carrie Fisher died in real life. Maybe Star Wars needs to die. Until then, carpe diem.


C-Notes for MON 25 DEC 2017 CHRISTMAS DAY

1. STATUS: Missing Twitter in the worst way as news breaks about Julian Assange's Twitter account getting banned/deleted. MERRY CHRISTMAS! (Happy Monday to you, atheists.)

3. Could Assange be trying to break his own addiction to social media? I imagine there's not much to do being trapped in an embassy for years.

4. If you are trapped in an embassy or just your parent's basement, I recommend a Vitamin D supplement. The body needs sunlight.

5. The Instant Pot is a scary device to me. I love my Crock pot, but the Instant Pot is an electric pressure cooker. To me, a pressure cooker is a bomb. Pressure cooking is just too scary for me.

6. DOWNSIDE: You got an Instant Pot for Christmas. UPSIDE: Makes a nice doorstep and planter.

7. One Christmas back in the 70's, everyone got everyone else a popcorn popper. It was a big deal that year.

8. I don't think you can make popcorn in an Instant Pot. It would definitely be a bomb then.

9. I can't say enough how much I like this president. You never heard Barack Obama talking like this. I can't say it enough. OBAMA WAS A DISGRACE.

10. I'm still waiting for Twitter to ban Trump. They know there will be a gigantic backlash, but they want to do it in the worst way. Jack Dorsey is a total Marxist progressive Mao Tse Tung loving autocratic dictator. Remember, the left wing only wants freedom for themselves and imprisonment for everyone else. You are only the freedom to agree with their program.

11. I agree with James Woods. Barack Obama is definitely a Muslim.

12. End all funding to the UN. Then, leave the UN. Then, tell the UN to leave the USA. We'll let Trump decide what to do with the vacated real estate.

13. I miss the Blue Light Special.

14. I remember as kid loading up once a month to go to the big city to visit K-mart. That was a big deal. Then, our town got a Wal-Mart, and that was the end of the big city trips to K-Mart. K-Mart is still around, but it's more sadness than nostalgia. The store definitely had an ambiance missing from Wal-Mart. I think it was the music playing over the speakers.

15. I am proud of myself because this is the first year I haven't broken down and played "Christmas in Hollis" by RUN-DMC. That really is a horrible Christmas song only outdone by "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer."

16. Julian Assange's account is back. I think he was trying to break the habit but couldn't.

17. MEMENTO MORI: A lot of Christians died at the hands of ISIS over the last few years. They were martyrs for our Lord. Are we prepared to suffer and die like them? It may come to that. Carpe diem.


C-Notes for SUN 24 DEC 2017 CHRISTMAS EVE

1. STATUS: Waiting to go to Midnight Mass. Taking time out to bang out a blog post.

2. MUSIC: King's College Cambridge 2010 #6 In dulci jubilo

3. I have had this experience countless times especially when I ask others to pray for me. An open parking space is always a miracle.

4. The Last Jedi continues to disappoint.

5. Subway is imploding. The company can give a lot of reasons for this, but we all know it was because of Jared Fogle. Once your brand name becomes synonymous with pedophilia, you're going to have a real hard time getting people to eat there.

6. The Roman Catholic Church has the same problem as Subway.

7. I still eat at Subway. This is because I am vegan, and my options are limited. I am also Roman Catholic, and this is because my options are limited there, too.

8. CURRENT READING: Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien. I have been reading this one for awhile taking breaks to read non-fiction along the way. It is a weighty tome. I am approximately halfway through. It is way better than Star Wars.

9. This is what Trump got done this year. This guy is an awesome president, and I am so glad I voted for him. Barack Obama was the worst president this country ever had. His time in office was an eight year nightmare, and people know it. I hope we get eight years of Trump to restore this country.

10. I've been listening to a lot of Christmas music this year, and I have to say that Nat King Cole's singing was the best. I think Dean Martin was liquored up on virtually everything he sang while Sinatra seemed a bit egomaniacal. Nat always delivers.

11. Rod Dreher does some ivory tower schtick regarding Trump. Conservatism is a philosophy, and it will endure as a philosophy as it always has. Likewise, conservative politicians will adhere to greater or lesser degrees to that philosophy. Trump is not 100% conservative. He is more conservative than Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, or Jeb! Bush. He is less conservative than Ted Cruz. So, what? For Dreher, the great dilemma is the purity of the label "conservative." We are winning, and this guy dismisses it as some sort of pyrrhic victory. Stupid. BTW, the Benedict Option looks dumber by the day. I like the way Trump does it better than the way guys like Dreher do nothing.

12. 20 Holy Hacks to Help You Get to Heaven because we need all the help we can get.

13. MEMENTO MORI: This is the time of the year when there are a high number of suicides. I had a friend who committed suicide. Life is short enough, so you don't have to hasten the end. And eternity is forever. Carpe diem.


SOC 26

Music produces a kind of pleasure which human nature cannot do without.

I love classical music. I usually write these blog posts while classical music plays in my headphones. I've tried listening to rock music, but it is too distracting and upsetting. Right now, I am listening to Durufle's Requiem. It is a splendid piece of music that I recommend. But where does rock and roll fit into my life? That's a good question.

My mental space is bifurcated between the high and the low. While I listen to requiems, I also indulge in AC/DC once in awhile. It is a guilty pleasure. I contemplate the bifurcation and a possible purgation of all that is low. Those low pleasures truly are guilty. This is the music that I imagine plays on Hell's Jukebox.

This article informs my thinking currently. Basically, it makes the case for a transcendant norm in the musical realm, and it's lead off quotation from Plato eats at me:
“…when lawlessness has established itself there [in music and poetry], it flows over little by little into character and ways of life.” Plato, Republic 424d
We can laugh at the country preacher railing against the evils of the Devil's Music, but that preacher is onto something. When God is lost, a debased culture emerges. We see this today in our music, our art, our cinema, our architecture, and our literature. Things have gotten so bad that we see that our musicians, artists, actors, writers, and directors can't quite pull it off anymore. Things went bad 50 to 60 years ago with the baby boomers, and it has degraded to this current point. Our culture has lost its soul.

Listening to classical music is a kind of rebellion against the cultural garbage and rot. Listening to the good stuff has the effect on my brain of turning on a firehose in a dirty barn. The dirt and filth come from yielding to all those temptations to listen to AC/DC. I ponder what it would be like to expunge the low stuff from my life for good. For now, I try to increase the influence of the high stuff in my life.

This high/low thing is not particular to me, but it is also reflected in the liturgy wars between those preferring the Latin Mass of the Extraordinary Form and the Novus Ordo of the Ordinary Form. I have never been to a Latin Mass, but I am for it. I am a Summorum Pontificum Catholic. I think that was the best thing Pope Benedict ever did for us, and I think the fact that Benedict is still with us is the only reason Summorum Pontificum continues. The current occupant of Peter's Chair has made no effort to conceal his disdain for the Latin Mass. When Benedict dies, I fully expect the Latin Mass to die with him. That would be sad.

There has always been and always will be a tension between the old and the new. I love classical music, but I listen to it from YouTube on a PC. If it wasn't for technology, I would be deprived of all this great old music. Prior to the internet, it was the classical NPR radio station and my CD player that brought this great music to me. Technology is a good thing. But then, you have the electric guitar which is the primary instrument of rock and roll. Thanks to electricity and electronics, bad musicians can make really loud noises. Should we blame the technology?

Modernism is the belief that the new must automatically be better. But we know better. Technology can improve life, but it can never serve as a substitute for the permanent things. Some things just don't ever change. Morality, truth, goodness, and beauty remain fixed forever. These things resist innovation. The result is that we have big budget movies with eye popping special effects which are inferior to the plays of Shakespeare written for a common stage. Likewise in politics, conservatism triumphs over Marxism and technocracy.

I don't like to think in terms of traditionalism and modernism. It is a false dichotomy. A better set of terms would be the popular and the permanent. A classic example of this would be the First Amendment. If we applied gun control logic to the First Amendment, we would only have freedom of the press for actual printed works on paper but not for television, radio, or the internet since these technologies did not exist when the First Amendment was drafted. Somehow, technology voids those First Amendment provisions. But we know this is nonsense in the same way that we know the Second Amendment does not restrict us to the freedom to carry single shot muskets and nothing else.

The permanent things always remain. The popular will always change. Music may not always be beautiful, but Faure's Requiem will always be beautiful. The sad thing today is that so much of our culture is an outright assault on the permanent things. So many creative people are not creators but destroyers. They make ugly art in the hope that they will obliterate beauty itself. But can the darkness eat the light? It is absurd and risible.

In other news, I think I am at the point of victory in my battle with social media addiction. My problem is a simple one. When I gave up meat, it was easy. This is because meat is totally bad in my mind. Except for survival situations, I can see no good reason to ever eat meat. Consequently, giving it up is no biggie. But social media has been hard because it can actually be used for good ends. This mixture of good and bad is what makes it such a pain to quit.

I love the internet. When I first encountered the internet so many years ago, I knew that it was a good thing that would change my life for the better, and it has. Back then, AOL was the big thing, but I didn't care about it at all. I just wanted to access all that awesome information that would have taken forever to discover in a library. But AOL was the social media of its day. Facebook, Twitter, and the rest merely continue a thing that was already in existence at the beginning. The only difference is that people are starting to question its benefits.

Social media addiction and pathologies are a thing now. The mainstream media have picked up on this and run a story almost daily about the pitfalls of social media or the liberation people feel when they are free of it. I have been off Twitter long enough to experience the benefits and appreciate the difference of a life free from social media. What draws me back is when I see or hear someone in the media mention their social media accounts. I am a news and politics junkie, so Twitter is the platform for those in that world. I experience the Fear of Missing Out or FOMO, so I resurrect my deleted account and lose myself in that world again. Then, after the relapse has set in, I feel self-loathing and disgust at myself for being so weak. Then, I deactivate my account and begin again.

There isn't enough social pressure in the world to make me eat meat again or buy a smartphone or abandon my Catholic faith, and the social pressure on those things is considerable. Likewise, there is pressure to be on social media. When you are a blogger, it is expected that you will also have accounts on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. I bow to that pressure. I shouldn't, but I do.

I experienced something similar to FOMO when I gave up watching professional sports. I was a diehard sports fan for years with basketball being my favorite sport. But I quit it all, and I have no regrets about it whatsoever. Watching sports is a waste of life. Play sports instead. Anyway, to this day, guys will be talking about something that happened in the sports world, and I am totally MO or missing out. And, I don't care. I don't voice what I am thinking, but I am thinking that these people are totally wasting their lives on that garbage.

I don't think politics is a waste of time or life because those things are important. People that try and ignore politics do so at their own peril. This is because politics will certainly take an interest in you. When some popular riot occurs, it's too late to go grab a newspaper to figure out what is going on. It behooves everyone to care about these things.

Stupid and uneducated people fail to follow the news. This is why I find the NFL anthem protests so ironic. People who watch sports usually don't care about politics. Now, politics is being rubbed in their faces.

It would be nice to live in blissful ignorance of political things, but this ignorance cannot last indefinitely. You can either be proactive on these things by keeping up with them or be reactive to these things when they come and hunt you down and force you on the cattle cars to the concentration camps. Twitter will certainly have a hashtag on it.

I didn't get Twitter for a long time, but this was because I was outside of politics and news. I was libertarian, but this is more philosophy than politics. Most libertarians have dropped out of the political world and retreated to an ivory tower of theories. But when I came back around to conservatism, I saw why Twitter mattered.

Twitter knows what it is which is why it has taken to censoring right wing voices. GAB has emerged as the alternative for the right and alt right, yet there is no GAB app on either Android or iOS. Things have gotten nasty as the progressives try to censor the conservatives. It is a fight, and I love a good fight.

I am torn between trying to break a bad habit or missing out on a good fight. This is my FOMO. I fear the fight for right needs me, and I am MIA in this battle. This is not a good place to be. As far as blogging goes, it is far from the action now. It is rear echelon stuff in this cultural and political war. Even now as I write this, I want to fire up my Twitter account again and get back to fighting. This will lead to another lost weekend tweeting. I can't do that anymore.


C-Notes for FRI 22 DEC 2017

1. STATUS: Happy to be heading into a three day weekend. My Christmas shopping is not complete. HAPPY FRIDAY!

2. GHETTO NAME OF THE DAY: Montel. Inspired by the location of conception.

3. I have to laugh when progressives complain about the Trump tax cuts especially when they are going to be beneficiaries of those tax cuts. Here's a suggestion for you Marxist idiots out there. If you really oppose the Trump tax cuts, you can give the money you don't want back to Uncle Sam. Here's the link for you to make gifts to the government you love so much. Just send in a check, and you will be putting your money where your mouth is. But I know better. I know this will never happen because liberals love spending other people's money while keeping their own. This is not charity. This is theft.

4. Apple confesses to slowing down your old phones, but they claim it is to keep the older models working longer. The reality is that you will be working longer to pay for that new iPhone X that you will have to buy either because you want it or because you were left with no choice but to want it.

5. Mueller does one thing I like. He keeps his mouth shut. This is always a good strategy. Calvin Coolidge would be proud.

6. DOWNSIDE: You hate the president who cut your taxes, but you look like an idiot when you express the hatred. UPSIDE: Most of your peers are just as stupid as you are.

7. I find it hard to believe that Cenk Uygur was once a conservative. He was really just a jerk back then just like he is now. He just found that there's more dough to be made on the left side of the street like David Brock and Arianna Huffington did.

8. I have never been a progressive. I was a libertarian for a decade but mainly because it made it easier to be a jerk. I came back to my senses.

10. John Schnatter aka "Papa John" aka the CEO of Papa John's Pizza is totally right about the NFL protests. He's right about a lot of other things, too. Naturally, the company fired him for being in touch with reality and having the stones to speak the truth.

11. I don't think Kim Jong Un will live to see the end of 2018.

12. People who hate the Trump tax cuts are free to leave for the better life in North Korea.

14.  MUSIC: Vince Guaraldi Trio - A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965) [Full Soundtrack]. A favorite of my wife. Merry Christmas!

15. THINGS THAT NEED TO BE SAID: NeverTrumpers are now going to have an impossible time convincing me or anyone else with common sense that we would better off with Hillary Clinton as president right now. If you can't support Trump now, you are not a conservative. You are something else entirely. Take a play from Mueller and shut your piehole.

16. MEMENTO MORI: A father wanted to surprise his kids, so he dressed as Santa Claus and went down his own chimney. He got stuck and died. Actually, this is an urban myth. Either way, stay out of chimneys. Carpe diem.



1. STATUS: Happy that Trump got his tax cut. It feels good to be winning after the eight year nightmare that was Barack Obama.

2. GHETTO NAME OF THE DAY: Kentavious. A mixture of Ken and a portion of devious probably in reference to the deadbeat dad who skipped out on the child support.

3. Twitter has no problem banning "violent" right wingers, but violent left wingers like Antifa get the pass. Another good reason to eschew social media.

4. This is the best review I've seen for Star Wars: The Last Jedi. The review is probably better than the movie that I have no plans of seeing. This movie is really bad from all of the reviews I have seen so far. And I admit to a certain schadenfraude at Disney's expense because they paid George Lucas $4 billion for the franchise. At this rate, I highly doubt they will ever earn enough to justify paying that amount.

5. Mark Hamill takes a dump on it, too. I respect that guy. He knows the movie is lousy, but he did what they needed to pass the baton to these losers. I wouldn't let Rian Johnson direct any more of these movies. They just need J.J. Abrams to come in and copy the original movies with different characters like he did with The Force Awakens.

6. I don't particularly like Star Wars or Star Trek and other movies that appeal to nerds. But the original Star Wars did have a resemblance to the classics just set in a science fictional universe. To that extent, I liked it. But it should have ended with Return of the Jedi. Instead, we have a franchise whose primary aim is to sell toys to a new generation of kids while they rape the childhood of a bunch of whiny adults who should move on to more serious entertainment like Stanley Kubrick movies.

7. Darth Vader or Kylo Ren can't hold a candle to this guy:

8. If anyone fell to the dark side, it was George Lucas who sold your childhood for $4 billion.

10. DOWNSIDE: You are a complete sell out preferring to sacrifice artistic integrity for cold, hard cash. UPSIDE: $4 billion.

11. I suspect Mark Hamill was kept in the dark about this movie. The look on the man's face is priceless.

12. Maybe Jack Nicholson could play the new bad guy in Star Wars 9. I'd have to go see that one.

13. MEMENTO MORI: 944 traffic deaths in SC this year. I expect it to bust 1000 by next week. I also hope to be one of the survivors. Carpe diem.


C-Notes for SUN 17 DEC 2017 GAUDETE SUNDAY

1. STATUS: Healthy. Wife, not so healthy.

4. Social media is bad. But we already know this.

5. GHETTO NAME OF THE DAY: Aquanette. Inspired by the hairspray, no doubt.

6. I pray daily for the people of North Korea. Being in San Quentin is better than being a citizen of that country.

7. Fire Mueller. We already have a constitutional crisis, and this guy is out of control. He won't stop until he has manufactured a crime to use to impeach Trump.

Mueller is amused when asked if there are any limits to his power or his evil.

8. Though Al Franken resigned, I don't actually expect that he will actually resign now that Roy Moore has been defeated. That whole fiasco was a head fake, and it will become more ludicrous the longer Franken remains in the Senate. I expect him to run for reelection when his term expires, and he will win. Democrats!

9. Looks like Pope Francis is chafing a bit after publication of The Dictator Pope. You can expect the anonymous author of that tome to face excommunication the moment he is identified unless it turns out he is Lutheran.

10. The one thing missing from Star Wars is sodomy. Who knew?

11. DOWNSIDE: You won a presidential election, but the Deep State and the Left Wing Media won't let you be president. UPSIDE: You've already done more in a year than most presidents do in 8.

12. You can watch The Last Jedi or save the dough and read this review instead. Disney is on a mission to kill all that was good in the world. Star Wars will be in the bodycount.

13. Star Wars could use some translesbians. Maybe they could also be Wookiees.

Chewie is not amused.
14. I gave up watching NFL tackle football long before it was patriotic or cool. That time is better spent with family and friends playing the delightful game of bocce.

15. Looks like Chris Matthews will go down with Matt Lauer and Tavis Smiley for being a creepy heterosexual. Maybe he could resign like Al Franken.

16. George Clooney is doing a series on Watergate for Netflix. The reasons are obvious. They are still gloating about how they took down a Republican president and wish to do so again.

17. You can totally disrespect the flag and the fans and this great nation. No biggie. But tweeting on the job in the NFL will not be tolerated.

18. They could probably build an entire new Star Wars trilogy based on this family. They just have to be Wookiees.

Chewbacca is still not amused.

19. This guy is a complete idiot at an entirely new level. It's bad enough to be a leftist, but you want to stick to tattoos of Mao and Che. They are way better looking than that witch.

20. MEMENTO MORI: Some people choose death before they are in the grave. This is called "retirement." Don't do it. Use every day you have. Carpe diem.