Rhiannon's Law #22. You can't lie to yourself, so don't bother trying. Doing so only multiplies your douchebag level to the umpteenth power and confirms what others have been saying for years - that you are an idiot.
J.A. SAARE
I admit that "douchebag" is an impolite term, but I don't know of another word that fits. The douchebag is where vanity and stupidity meet. I find douchebags irritating and annoying, but I also admit that self-awareness will always elude them. Douchebags have a special type of narcissism where insults only feed their pride.
My neighbor is a douchebag. He plays Nickelback and bro country too loudly because it is not enough to listen to music. You have to listen to bad music and force others to listen to it, too. This music gets drowned out as the douchebag cranks his loud pickup truck with the douchebag rims 20 times per day. He doesn't go anywhere. He just cranks the truck and revs the motor. Otherwise, this douchebag has nothing to do and all day to do it.
Virtually everything this guy does is for the sake of vanity. He is always messing with some toy like a muscle car or a boat. He doesn't actually fix these things like a real mechanic but makes them louder with glasspack mufflers and changes out the rims. That's it. Then, he gets bored and switches to some new toy. It is a profound waste of a life, but this is what idiots do when they are bored.
I have never been a douchebag. I have dressed in some slobby outfits, but I am a decade removed from wearing cargo shorts and T-shirts. Douchebags actually dress a bit nicer than this but not by much. Their favorite thing to wear is a tank top shirt to show off their arms and chest paired with some sort of jewelry and a ear ring. Additionally, facial hair has to be a love brush under the bottom lip or a chin brush. Douchebags have to split the difference between being clean shaven and having a full beard. As for the hair, it has to have gel if the head is not shaved.
Douchebags exist because today's man has lost all role models for manliness. Instead, they emulate professional athletes, rappers, and characters from The Fast And The Furious film franchise. Then, there is the phenomenon known as Andrew Tate who has inspired thousands of men worldwide to go full douchebag with their lives.
Now, I am an old man in his fifth decade of life. You might expect me to look to Randolph Scott and John Wayne as proper role models for manliness, but I don't. These men were actors. Role models need to be real flesh and blood human beings. I also do not look to professional athletes as very few have the dignity of true manhood. For me, my role models came from old men that I knew in my youth who worked blue collar jobs and dressed the part. These men were about work and not much else.
If I had to pick a popular culture depiction of douchebags and classy old men, I would select The Karate Kid. In the movie, the Cobra Kai sensei, John Kreese, represents the douchebag while the handyman Mr. Miyagi represents the humble but classy old man. Kreese is toxic masculinity. Miyagi is non-toxic masculinity. The film is a great story about the clash of these two ways of manliness. Ultimately, Kreese is not manly at all. His lack of honor and decency cost him the respect of his own pupils.
The best path is wisdom and humility. Miyagi has both. Kreese has neither. Don't be a douchebag.
